Imagine a world where we didn’t just think but also felt and acted from our full intelligence. How would that be?
- Christoffel Sneijders
- Apr 22
- 10 min read
The science of 3 Brains Intelligence — and how it’s the “magic wand” we need for real change in business and beyond.
Imagine a world where leaders paused before making decisions.
Where they asked not just, “What brings in the money?” but also, “What’s kind?” and “What is the right thing to do?”
Imagine a society where every boardroom, parliament, or family dinner honoured logic, empathy, and instinct equally.
What if our Head gave us clarity,
Our heart offered compassion,
And our Gut delivered bold action — all working in unison?
Imagine what kind of world we could build — at work, in love, and in leadership — if every decision included input from all three brains.
It makes me remember John Lennon’s song Imagine: “Imagine all the people, living life in peace… No need for greed or hunger, …. Imagine all the people, Sharing all the world, ”
Take a moment. A breath.
This vision isn’t a fantasy. It’s actually in our DNA and biology.
It’s what I call 3 Brains Intelligence, and it might just be the “magic wand” we’ve been looking for — not only to change ourselves, but to change the world.
We’ve Been Trying to Run on One Leg
We’ve been taught to rely on the Head/Gut Brain combination — our logic, rationality, and plans, combined with the mentality that winners take it all.
It is these two brains that (business-)schools train, businesses promote, and societies reward.
But this is like trying to run a marathon on one leg. You may move forward — for a while — but at great cost. You stumble, strain, and eventually fall.
We’ve ignored to properly educate the other sources of intelligence that live within us:
The Heart Brain, our centre of emotion, connection, and compassion.
The Gut Brain, our source of instinct, power, and survival.
These are not poetic ideas. They are rooted in neuroscience.
Your heart and gut have independent neural networks — their own memory, logic, and voice.
And unless we bring all three online, we are living and leading from a fragmented self.
No wonder we’re stuck, burned out, unfulfilled and running behind pleasure and short-term gratification instead of happiness and healthy contribution.
So yes, let's pause before making decisions.
The Lie We’ve Been Sold About Change and Development
The personal development world has repeated one mantra: “Change your mindset, and you change your life.”
We’ve been told to think positively, stay disciplined, and push through resistance.
But when those methods fail, we blame ourselves.
“I must not want it enough.”
“I lack discipline.”
“I need to be stronger.”
But what if the problem isn’t that we’re weak…
What if we’re simply misaligned?
The truth is: your Head Brain might agree to change, but if your Heart doesn’t feel safe, or your Gut doesn’t see how it wins, the change won’t stick.
Change and development aren’t a mental game. It’s a biological collaboration.
Who’s Actually Driving Your Life?
Let’s look at these three brains again.
Your Head Brain helps you plan, analyse, and structure.
Your Heart Brain feels, connects, and evaluates what truly matters.
Your Gut Brain protects, acts, and powers you forward.
Each brain evolved to serve you. But each has its fears.
The Head fears confusion.
The Heart fears rejection.
The Gut fears losing control.
That is why you feel torn, hesitant, reactive, or exhausted when they’re out of sync.
And when only one brain is leading, as it often is, you end up with one-brain decisions that may look good in theory but feel wrong in practice.
Why We Keep Falling Short (Even When We Know Better)
Have you ever read an inspiring book, felt ready to change, and then… did nothing?
Have you ever said, “This time I’ll speak up,” and then stayed quiet?
Have you promised to finally take action, only to find yourself procrastinating or self-sabotaging?
This isn’t weakness.
What’s happening is that your Head Brain says, “Yes,” but your Heart whispers, “I’m afraid they don’t like it,” or your Gut growls, “This doesn’t feel safe.”
Change that isn’t agreed upon by all 3 Brains feels like an inner war.
That’s why we stall. That’s why we feel torn. That’s why we say, “I know what to do, but I just can’t seem to do it.”
True transformation begins when all 3 say “Yes.”
In Business, One-Brain Leadership Is Costing Us
In most companies, leadership is built on Head Brain values: strategy, logic, and performance, and coated with a Gut Brain veneer of “we have to win.”
But what about the Heart Brain’s emotional intelligence?
Or the Gut Brain’s decisive energy to achieve what does not mean the other needs to lose?
We see:
Burnout from Heart-led leaders trying to please without boundaries.
Toxic cultures from Gut-driven bosses who dominate but don’t connect.
Analysis paralysis from Head-centric managers who think but never act.
Organisations break not because people lack skill, but because leaders are operating from one brain, not three.
When leaders learn 3 Brains Intelligence, they begin to recognise:
“This decision is logical — but does it feel right?”
“This plan is bold — but is it aligned with our values?”
“This change is emotional — but are we grounded enough to carry it through?”
With that kind of alignment, innovation rises. Trust grows. Performance improves.
And people feel seen, heard, and empowered.
Compassion Is Strategic
Let’s talk about the Heart Brain.
Many believe it doesn’t belong in business, that compassion slows us down.
But the truth is, when your Heart Brain is active, supported by the Head’s clarity and the Gut’s decisiveness, you become a leader who inspires lasting loyalty, creativity and achievements.
Bill Campbell, mentor to the founders of Google and Apple, was known not just for his smarts but for how deeply he cared.
He built trust.
He led with heart.
And his teams didn’t just succeed — they thrived.
Compassion isn’t weakness.
It’s a biological strength in alignment.
How the World Became What It Is
This isn’t just about individuals.
This is about how the world has been shaped by one-brain bias, and gender roles have amplified it.
For centuries, boys were trained to lead from the Gut: be strong, win, act.
Their Heart Brain, their ability to feel, empathise, and be vulnerable, was silenced.
They were told, “Don’t cry. Don’t show weakness.”
Girls, on the other hand, were encouraged to lead from the Heart: be kind, serve, nurture.
Their Gut Brain — their ambition, instinct, and self-care — was discouraged.
They were taught, “Don’t be too assertive. Don’t take up space.”
And so we built a world:
Where men often burn out, proving their worth.
Where women suppress their power to stay liked.
Where leadership is disconnected from compassion.
Where decisions are made from fear or anger, not alignment.
We did not build this world out of malice. We built it out of an inherited imbalance.
But we can change it.
We can unlearn.
We can realign
.We can teach our children to lead from all three brains, regardless of gender.
Imagine the World That’s Possible
Imagine a world where boys are taught that strength includes sensitivity, where girls are taught that kindness includes power.Leaders are trained to pause and ask,“Does this make sense?”“Does this feel right?”“Does this move us forward with integrity?”
Imagine relationships where we stop arguing about words… and start listening to which brain is talking.
Imagine cultures where courage and compassion aren’t opposites — they’re partners.
This world is possible.
It’s already inside us.
It Starts with the Brain in the Mirror
If you want to change your life—or the world—don’t just push harder.
Pause. Look inward.
And ask:
What does my Head think?
What does my Heart feel?
What does my Gut sense?
Because once all three are aligned…
Change and development no longer feel like pressure.
It feels like the truth.
Like peace.
Like power.
This is the promise of 3 Brains Intelligence.
This is how we move from fragmentation to flow.From fear to freedom.From surviving to creating a better future — together.
Imagine That Every Relationship (Personal or Business) Had All Three Brains in the Room
Let’s bring it closer now — from boardrooms to bedrooms, from global visions to intimate conversations.
Because the same imbalance that shows up in business also shows up in relationships.
And just like in leadership, we often try to fix relationship problems with only one part of us online.
We talk from the Head while our Heart is hurting.
We protect our Gut by shutting down emotionally.
We over-apologise from the Heart while our Gut screams to be heard.
We listen with logic but not with love.
And so we stay misunderstood, disconnected, or caught in patterns that feel impossible to escape.
Which Brain Is Talking in Your Relationships?
Think about your last conflict with a partner, colleague, friend, or family member.
Did you try to “explain your point” while feeling tense in your stomach?
Did you shut down emotionally because it felt too vulnerable?
Did you overthink every word while your Heart broke silently?
We’ve all been there.
In most relationship breakdowns, it’s not the words we use that cause damage — it’s the misalignment between our brains. And even more so, the mismatch between the brains of two people trying to connect.
Let’s say:
Your partner is operating from the Heart — they want to connect and feel heard.
But you’re in Gut Brain — needing to assert or defend yourself.
Or you’re in your Head — trying to “solve the issue” logically.
Even if you love each other deeply, your words won’t land because the brains aren’t speaking the same language.
And the result?
Frustration. Misinterpretation. Distance.
The Biology of Disconnection — and the Path Back to Each Other
In my book Relationships: Which Brain is Talking?, I write about five core misalignments that block intimacy, trust, and emotional safety. Here’s what’s powerful: they don’t just apply to couples. They reflect global conditioning.
Society teaches men to operate mainly from the Gut Brain — act, protect, control. And it teaches women to live from the Heart Brain — nurture, please, care.
What’s left out?
For men, it’s the permission to feel.
For women, it’s the power to act.
And for both, it’s the alignment of all three.
This is not about blame. It’s about awareness.
Because when we recognise these inherited imbalances, we can stop performing outdated roles… and start meeting each other as whole humans.
Imagine if every couple, team, or family had the language to say:
“Right now I’m in my Gut — I need to protect myself.”
“I’m in my Heart — I need connection.”
“I’m in my Head — I’m overthinking everything.”
Just that moment of awareness can dissolve tension.
It turns conflict into connection.
It turns blame into understanding.
It brings all three brains into the room.
The Power of Emotional Alignment
The Power of Emotional Alignment
Here’s what real intimacy looks like:
Not just sharing thoughts.
Not just exchanging feelings.
Not just agreeing on goals.
But knowing which brain is speaking, and listening with all three of yours.
When two people align Head, Heart, and Gut — together — a different kind of love, trust, and teamwork emerges. It’s the kind of connection that feels grounded, safe, alive.
In those moments, you’re not just talking — you’re meeting each other fully.
And from that place, even difficult conversations become healing.
Even hard truths can be received with grace.
Even distance can turn into deeper closeness.
Real Tools for Real Connection
To bring this into everyday life, here’s a powerful, simple practice:
When you feel tension rising, pause and ask:
Gut Brain Check: Am I in protection mode? Is my survival instinct running the show? What does my body want to do — fight, freeze, or flee?
Heart Brain Check: What emotion am I feeling but not expressing? What do I need emotionally that I’m not voicing?
Head Brain Check: Am I overanalysing or judging instead of listening? Do I have clarity about what this is really about?
No judgment. Just awareness.
Because once you know who’s driving, you get to choose differently.
You can bring the other brains back into the conversation.
And you can co-create a space where both of you — all of you — can feel safe, seen, and supported.
This Is Not Self-Help. This Is Relationship Liberation.
When we understand the 3 Brains Intelligence model, we stop making others wrong for how they respond.
We stop assuming someone doesn’t care just because they go silent.
We stop interpreting emotion as weakness or control as aggression.
Instead, we see the biology at play.
We see the scared Heart.
The overwhelmed Head.
The protecting Gut.
And we soften.We meet them — and ourselves — with compassion and clarity.
That’s how relationships change.
Not by reading more books.
Not by winning more arguments.
But by integrating our full intelligence into how we love and listen.
Love Is Strongest When All Three Brains Say Yes
You know the feeling.
When a decision, or a connection, just feels right.
Not just in your head, but in your chest… and deep in your belly.
That grounded clarity.
That emotional resonance.
That energised momentum.
That is what happens when your three brains are aligned.
And that is what every great relationship - romantic, professional, or familial - is truly made of.
Not perfection. But presence.Not flawless communication. But courageous integration.Not just love… but love with all three brains online.
Imagine the Ripple Effect
Imagine a world where leaders communicate from alignment, where couples stop fighting over who’s right and start exploring what each brain needs.
Where children grow up learning that thinking, feeling, and acting are all valid ways of being wise.
Imagine if the future weren’t ruled by a win-or-lose mentality alone, but guided by compassion, courage, and clarity in balance.
We’d see:
Less war.
More healing.
Less burnout.
More belonging.
Less fear-driven reaction.
More heart-centred action.
We’d be less alone. And far more whole.
It Begins with You
The systems won’t change until the people in them do.
And we won’t change until we meet all parts of ourselves with love and curiosity.
So the invitation is simple, but profound:
Before your next conversation… check in.
Before your next big decision… listen in.
Before you react… realign.
Which brain is leading me right now?
Which one needs to be heard?
What would it feel like to move from all three?
Because when you live from 3 Brains Intelligence, you stop hopping through life.
You move with strength, heart, and clarity.
And your relationships, your work, your world… all begin to transform.
Ready to Start?
Take the free 3 Brains Preference Test to become aware which of your 3 brains is subconsciously making your decisions:
Or read more in my book Relationships: Which Brain is Talking?
And if you’re ready to guide others through this transformation — in coaching, leadership, or life — join the 3 Brains Intelligence Coach Certification:
You’ll not only change lives — you’ll help reshape the world.
Because once you learn to walk with all three brains…
You’ll never want to go back to living on one leg again.
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